Wayside: A Serial Novel - Episode 16
This is a work of fiction. Unless otherwise indicated, all the names, characters, businesses, places, events and incidents in this book are either the product of the author's imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.
Episode 16: Dance
Josina couldn’t stop smiling.
The night before, she’d dreamed about Jasmine, about meeting her for the first time. They’d exchanged stories about their lives. Showed each other pictures. They’d laughed and wept in equal measure.
And in the dream, they were at Wayside on a beautiful, sunny day. Josina introduced Jasmine to everyone on the Founders’ Council. They dined at the Black Sheep. They watched Siado perform for a packed crowd at Bonfire Pavillion. Then when the sky turned indigo and the moon rose high above them, they went home to the villa. Jasmine retreated to the guest bedroom, Josina to the master bedroom, where Ben was waiting for her.
They kissed, like it was the most natural thing in the world.
And then she woke up.
“I’m worthy,” she’d been whispering to herself throughout the day. “I am.”
Although the details of the dream were fading quickly, the warmth and happiness remained. Josina’s mood was light as she knocked out much of her to-do list that morning, answering emails and tackling admin tasks at her computer. She was still grinning from ear to ear when an incoming videocall alert appeared on the screen.
The caller ID feature displayed the name of the person on the other end of the line. Josina’s smile grew even wider as she clicked the ‘answer’ button.
A familiar face appeared on her screen.
“Good afternoon, Kaafi!” Josina exclaimed.
“Hello Josina!” Kaafi smiled at the sight of her. “Listen, I’m calling because I just left the hospital and I have some unfortunate news.”
Josina’s smile faded. “Oh… what’s going on?”
“It’s about your stepfather. I got word that he’d had a heart attack last night, so I went to visit him with a vase of flowers from the community center. But by the time I got there, I learned he’d taken a turn for the worse and didn’t survive.”
Josina’s jaw dropped. “Yasir is dead?”
“Yes. I’m very sorry to pass along this news. I remember, of course, that you didn’t have the best relationship with him, but family is family, so I’m calling to offer my condolences. I’m very sorry for your loss.”
“Oh,” Josina sank back in her seat, shocked by the news. “Oh,” she repeated softly.
“I spoke with your mother at the hospital,” said Kaafi.
Josina perked up again. “You did?”
“Yes. I hope you don’t mind, but I have her your phone number and she is supposed to call you soon.”
“Of course I don’t mind,” Josina smiled. “Thank you.”
“I’m not sure when the funeral will be, but if you’re planning to return for it, you’re welcome to stay in the house again,” Kaafi offered. “I’ve also let your mother know that if she needs any help with making funeral arrangements or settling his affairs, the community center is here to support her.”
“Thank you so much, Kaafi.” Josina leaned closer to the screen. “Wow. This… this is a lot.”
“I know. I’m so sorry.” He frowned, his brow knit with worry. “How are you feeling right now?”
“Conflicted,” she said with a laugh, then wiped a tear from the corner of her eye. “I won’t miss him, but I know my mother will. She loved him and was very loyal to him in spite of all his shortcomings. It will be a hard transition to a life without him, but now she can embrace the freedom it will bring. And hopefully I can be part of her life again.”
“I only spoke with her for a short while, but I got the sense that she was eager to talk to you and see you again.”
“Thank you.” Josina sniffled.
“I wish I were there, Josina, to hold you, to give you a shoulder to cry on.”
“I wish so too.” She smiled through her tears. “Oh – I have a happier bit of news to share with you. Do you remember me telling you all about that appointment I came up to Minneapolis for?”
“With the adoption agency?”
“Yes. I wrote a letter to my biological daughter and the agency delivered it to her. She already replied. Her name is Jasmine and she has my number, so she will contact me when she’s ready. But in the meantime, she sent me a picture. Hold on, let me find it on my phone.” Josina searched through her photos until she found the picture, enlarged it on the screen, then held it up for Kaafi to see.
“Oh my goodness,” he gasped. “Are you sure she isn’t your twin sister?”
Josina laughed. “I was surprised by how much we look alike.”
“She’s absolutely beautiful. Just like her mother.”
“Kaafi,” Josina laughed again. “You flatter me.”
“I can’t help it,” he swooned. It's not just your beautiful face I'm talking about. You have a beautiful heart. You really made an impression on me while you were here and I'm glad we got to spend so much time together."
“It was very special for me too.”
“I can’t stop thinking about that kiss, your last night here.”
Josina broke into giggles. “Ah, Kaafi. I admit I’ve replayed that moment in my mind as well, quite a few times. Thank you for that memory. I’ll always keep it close to my heart.”
“Same for me.” He nodded. “Listen, I’ve got to get back to the community center, so I’ll let you go for now. If there’s anything I can do for you or your mother, please reach out and let me know.”
“I will. Thank you, Kaafi.”
“Bye for now,” he waved through the screen before disconnecting.
Josina rested her hand over her heart.
I have a family, she told herself.
A daughter.
A mother.
And Ben.
She’d seen it so clearly in her dream, what a life with Ben as her partner would look like.
Josina was worthy of it and was ready to claim it.
It was time.
***
It was time.
After Ben had spoken to Reese at the pool that morning, he fought the urge to run to Josina’s door and tell her everything that was on his mind.
Instead, he took a walk and texted Olivia that he needed some time to himself that morning. He sent a second message encouraging her to take a look at the application for residency at Wayside while he was out and about. The ball was in her court now. If she wanted to move to Wayside with her mother, Ben had extended the invitation. It was her turn to take action.
He spent the morning walking around Wayside, reminiscing on its unusual beginnings and reflecting upon the growth – and the growing pains – of the community.
He found himself back at the merry-go-round, remembering Josina’s reaction to it. The grin on her face, the sparkle in her eye as she climbed onto an ornate white horse and slid her feet in the stirrups.
And what she’d told him.
We have to keep this! We have to hold onto some of the joy, some of the magic of this place!
As far as Ben was concerned, it was Josina who was the magic behind Wayside.
And it was Josina who was the joy of his life.
He created a playlist of her favorite songs, connected his phone to the sound system, and did his best to shut out the rest of the world while he spun round and round on the ride. It was soothing. It helped him bring calm to the chaos in his mind.
Within a short time, he noticed a theme in the lyrics of the songs. Some spoke of an innocent crush, while others went on about an all-consuming, unshakeable love. Some even told stories of unrequited love. The bittersweet, sorrowful yearning for connection with someone who might never feel the same way in return.
He recognized the songs from when they’d lived together.
Josina would sing them often. He’d heard her.
But he hadn’t been listening to her.
He was now.
It’s time, he told himself.
After powering down the merry-go-round and securing the gates surrounding the remnant rides from YOLO Park, Ben made his way to Josina’s villa. On the walkway toward her front door, his heart began to pound, his vision began to cloud. He shoved his fidgety hands into his pockets, took several deep breaths to calm himself.
It was time to tell Josina he loved her.
He’d known it since the week she’d moved in to care for his mother.
He knew the exact moment he’d fallen for her.
It happened the evening he passed by his mother’s bedroom to find Josina in the armchair next to her bed, knees drawn up to her chest, blanket around her shoulders, lavender hijab draped over her head and shoulders. Ben remembered the silvery threads in the garment, how they scattered rays from the setting sun throughout the room.
It was like Josina was a beacon of light that had just made her presence known in their lives during those dark days of 2020.
She was reading aloud from Marisol’s bible. Even though the scriptures were from a faith that was foreign to her, Josina read each word with conviction. Her voice trembled with emotion at the mention of Jesus healing a woman who’d been crippled for years, how he’d restored her body with only a touch. Marisol had been watching her, smiling broadly, her eyes drifting closed toward the end of the passage. When it was done, Josina reached out for Marisol’s hand and held it while she slept.
None of this had been in the job description Ben had sent out in his search for a private duty nurse. Josina had brought these gifts on her own accord. Sincerity, touch, presence. Compassion.
Love.
She’d been exactly what Marisol had needed.
And after her death, Josina became exactly what Ben needed.
She was the only one Ben needed, the only one he would ever need. He hoped she would understand why it had taken him so long to tell her.
On her doorstep, Ben reached up to knock.
He stopped himself.
There were voices coming from inside the villa.
Josina’s, and someone else’s. Someone he didn’t recognize.
She was on a call. The man spoke with a slight accent. Their conversation seemed friendly.
“It’s not just your beautiful face I’m talking about,” said the man. “You have a beautiful heart. You really made an impression on me while you were here and I’m glad we got to spend so much time together.”
Then Josina. “It was very special for me too.”
Then the mystery man again. “I can’t stop thinking about that kiss, your last night here.”
Ben pulled his hand away at the sound of Josina’s laughter.
“…I’ve replayed that moment in my mind as well, quite a few times…”
Ben swayed on his feet, clamped his hands down over his ears.
“No, no, no,” he whispered. “I’m too late. It’s too late.”
He stopped himself, took a deep breath.
Then he turned and walked away.
Shoulders slumped, eyes on the ground before him, Ben slowly made his way down the walking trail that took him back home. He reached for the doorknob, pausing at the sound of Olivia’s voice behind the door. It seemed she was on a call as well.
“I can’t.” She said. “I won’t.”
Ben heard the muffled voice of a man talking through her phone. It was too faint for him to make out the words, but the tone was unpleasant. The man’s voice was raised, almost to the point of shouting.
“I swear… I don’t want anything from you," Olivia pleaded. "Just my mother. If you could just put her in her wheelchair and pack up all her medications, I’ll come get her today and we can just forget about this whole thing. I won’t tell anyone—”
More angry commentary from the man on the other end of the line.
Olivia’s voice was trembling when she replied. “Please just let me have my mother back. She’s not going to live that much longer. I don’t want her to die without family by her side.”
Angry shouting. Olivia began to cry.
Ben sank down onto the front steps of the container home. He reached for his phone and placed a call.
“Wayside Housing Services, this is Amanda,” stated the cheerful voice on the other end of the line.
“Hi Amanda, it’s Ben.” He took a deep breath, then let it out slowly. “Got an urgent request. I need a wheelchair ramp added to my container home. How quickly could you send over a crew to level the ground and pour concrete?”
***
Once Cassie had shared the news of Chris’s predicament with the Founders’ Council, Tony and Reese volunteered to pick them up from Lucky Lodge and move them to the Best Guest extended stay hotel, along with delivering the supplies Cassie had put together.
Cassie had crammed as many things as she could for Chris into the duffel bags waiting by the door. At least three days’ worth of clean clothes, a stack of new N95s, tests, medications, vitamins, toiletries, homemade cookies. Leaning against the duffel bags was a padded carrying case with his work laptop and equipment.
Last but not least, she’d tucked into the front pocket of the carrying case a small photo album filled with pictures of the two of them, their life at Wayside, and printouts of her ultrasounds. She hoped it might help Chris connect with his mother, to help her access her memories of him, and share with her their joy and excitement over the baby.
A knock sounded on the door. Cassie opened it to find Tony and Reese ready to collect the items and start the short trip outside of Wayside.
“How you doing, Cass?” Reese asked. “I can’t imagine how stressful this must be.”
Cassie sighed. “It sucks, but I’m trying to stay positive for Chris’s sake.”
“So what’s the plan?” Tony asked as he reached for the bags.
“Not sure yet,” Cassie admitted. “We’re still trying to figure everything out. He wants to stay at the extended stay with his mom for at least the next few days, then test to see if either of them have Covid or flu. If either or both of them are positive, he’ll extend their stay until they’re negative again. In the meantime, he’s going to try to get his mother seen by a local doctor and figure out what kind of care she needs. We should have some answers within a few days, and we’ll go from there.”
“That’s all you can do, really – just take it a day at a time.” Reese nodded thoughtfully.
“He’ll definitely need transportation,” said Cassie. “Were you guys able to line up a vehicle to leave with him?”
“We were,” said Tony. “Since his mother is in a wheelchair, we’re taking a van with a ramp. We also borrowed a spare wheelchair from the health center just in case they need a backup, so it’s folded up in the back.”
“Prateeka also ran to the Wayside Swap Shop and picked up some secondhand clothes and shoes for his mom, along with some comfy blankets,” said Reese. “Bellamy also packed up some meals from The Black Sheep and sent them with us, so they’ll have plenty to eat for a couple of days. And I’ll let Chris know if he needs someone to talk to, he can call me any time, day or night.”
“Oh wow, thank you!” Tears sprang to Cassie’s eyes. “You’re making me cry. This is so amazing.”
“This is what makes us Wayside,” said Tony with a grin. “This is what a community is supposed to be. When we’re all looking out for each other, none of us have to bear the weight of any crisis all by ourselves.”
“You’re right,” Cassie nodded. “I know everything will be okay, thanks to all of you. Honestly, I think what’s stressing Chris out the most is knowing I could go into labor at any minute and he wouldn’t be here with me. It’s a big comfort for us both to know we’re not alone. We’ve got family all around us and it means the world to us.”
“And on that note,” said Reese, “promise us you’ll reach out to us if you need anything until Chris is back home. Even if it’s a late-night craving for pickles or ice cream or whatever. We’ve got your back, Cass.”
“I know. And I love you guys for it.” She wiped away a tear, then wrapped Tony and Reese in a group hug. “After my parents passed away, I thought Chris was the only family I had left. You guys keep proving me wrong.”
"Our families are bigger than we think," said Reese. “We just don’t realize it until we’re going through something difficult. Then we’re pleasantly surprised by the people who show up for us.”
“I’m thankful for the way you’ve shown up for me – and Chris, and his mother, and even the baby. Seriously, thank you so, so much.” Cassie gave Reese and Tony another squeeze before bidding them farewell and retreating inside.
She reached for her phone to message Chris that Reese and Tony were on their way, but was interrupted by a new email notification. She opened it to view the message.
Sender: Smallwood, Tabitha – Tarheel State Organ Procurement Association
Subject: Communication from donor family
Dear Cassie,
I hope this email finds you well. I tried calling you at the number in our records but found that it was out of service. I’m reaching out to let you know the family of your organ donor has sent a letter to our office for you and has indicated they would like to meet you. Please contact me at your earliest convenience so I can share their correspondence with you—
Cassie was overcome with a rush of emotions. She sat down on the sofa, reading and re-reading the message to be sure she understood it correctly.
She had wanted from the very beginning to meet her donor’s family, and had written a heartfelt letter to them while recovering from the transplant surgery.
The family had sent word back through the procurement agency that they weren’t ready.
Year after year, Cassie waited to hear from them.
Year after year, they remained silent.
Cassie had all but given up hope after moving to Wayside. She’d even neglected to contact the Tarheel State Organ Procurement Association to update her contact information, believing it was pointless, convinced she would never hear from the donor family.
Cassie read the email again, then put her phone down.
The message had left her with mixed feelings. She was grateful the family had reached out to express their readiness to connect with her.
Unfortunately, Cassie was now the one who wasn’t ready.
There was too much going on in her life.
The baby would be arriving at any moment.
Chris was away for an indefinite amount of time, and his mother was now their responsibility.
And it was a weird time at Wayside.
The vandalism of the mural.
The division between members of the Founders’ Council about hosting visitors and quarantine protocols at Wayside.
The dream she’d had not so long ago.
As Cassie stared down at the email once more, she remembered Reese’s words.
Our families are bigger than we think. We just don’t realize it until we’re going through something difficult. Then we’re pleasantly surprised by the people who show up for us.
Cassie reflected upon how grateful she was for the people who had shown up for her and Chris. She knew she couldn’t take them for granted. She felt the need to protect them. Maybe it wasn’t the best time for her to establish new connections outside of Wayside.
Maybe another day.
***
A knock sounded on Josina’s door.
She opened it to find Siado standing before her with a stack of formal dresses draped over her arm.
“Got a minute to help me pick out my dress for the dance tomorrow?” She asked.
“I think I can manage that,” Josina stood aside, welcoming Siado in. “I still need to do that myself, so maybe you can help me pick mine out too.”
“Of course! Go grab your finest out of your closet and put it on!”
Siado stepped into the bathroom to change into a purple mini dress with a sequined sash. Josina retreated to her bedroom and donned a light blue sheath dress with sheer sleeves. They met in the living room to critique each other’s picks.
“Oh my God, absolutely not,” Siado scolded Josina.
“What’s wrong with it?”
“It’s got mother-of-the-bride vibes. Just… no. Take that thing off before I stab my eyes out.”
Josina frowned. “That’s a bit dramatic, but alright. I’ve still got the little black dress I wore for New Years.”
“I don’t even think I saw it, since our New Years party was outdoors and we were all bundled up in heavy coats.”
“Allow me to wow you then.” Josina stepped into her bedroom again, emerging a few minutes later in an off-shoulder, fitted midi dress. She did her best catwalk across the living room floor, spun around for dramatic effect.
“Daaaaaamn,” Siado fanned her face with her hands. “Have you got a fire extinguisher in here? ‘Cause you look smoking hot, Josina. Wow!”
“So this one’s a winner?”
“Absolutely,” Siado gave an exaggerated nod. “Now we just have to make sure you can dance in it. We’re going to need some music for this!”
“You got it.” Josina found the remote and powered on the TV. She scrolled through the music channels until she found ‘Dance Radio’ and started the stream. To their delight, the first song in the lineup was one of Siado’s.
“BAILA!” Siado squealed and clapped her hands with excitement, singing along to her own voice blasting through the TV speakers. “Baila conmigo, mamacita, papacito!”
“Oi, that’s you!” Josina cried out with excitement. “Sometimes I forget you’re a mega star! I don’t think I’ve heard this one yet, but I love it!”
“It’s got a great, beat, doesn’t it?” She reached for Josina’s hand, leading her through the basic steps of a salsa dance. “One, two, step together! Three, four, step together!”
Giggling, Josina fumbled through the dance moves as best she could.
“Now when I dance forward, you go backward,” Siado directed. “Then we’re going to do the reverse. I’ll go backward, you dance forward!”
After a few more minutes of fumbling, giggling, and apologizing profusely for stepping on Siado’s toes, Josina finally mastered the dance.
“You’re going to slay tomorrow night!” Siado told Josina. “Between that dress and your new dance moves, trust me… when Ben sees you tomorrow night, there’s no way he’ll be able to resist you.”
Josina broke into laughter. “I don’t know about that. We’ll see.”
“Oh come on… haven’t you guys had ‘the talk’ yet?” She asked, hooking her fingers into air quotes.
“Not yet. We’ve both been busy.”
“What do you mean, busy?” Siado crossed her arms impatiently.
“I mean, he’s got company—”
“But he still has time for you. Come on, Josina. You’re avoiding it, aren’t you?”
“No,” she said defensively. “I mean, I was before… but not now. I fully intend to talk to him next chance we’re both available.”
“Wasn’t he just here?”
Josina’s brow wrinkled with confusion. “What? No. Why do you think so?”
“I saw him walking from this direction as I was approaching. I saw him coming down the walkway to your villa.”
“What? Really?”
“Yes, really.” Siado’s eyes grew wide. “Maybe he was coming to ask you to be his date to the dance tomorrow. Or maybe…. maybe he wants to be the one to tell you first that he’s madly in love with you and he’s been a wreck without you.”
Josina rolled her eyes.
“No, really! Think about it,” Siado pondered aloud. “Why in the world would he just show up at your door to talk to you about something he could have texted or called you about?”
“Well, if he came to my door, he didn’t knock,” said Josina. “Or I didn’t hear a knock, anyway. Now that I think about it, I was on a videocall just before you got here. So maybe he knocked, and I didn’t hear it. Or maybe he was going to knock, but he chickened out?
“Stop with the maybes!” Siado rested her hands on her hips. “I’m telling you, he was here. He came to your door, Josina. He must have been here to talk to you. Now it’s your turn to go to him. You have to.”
“Says who?” Josina laughed.
“It’s the rules,” said Siado. “Love is a dance. When one partner dances forward, the other retreats. It’s your turn to dance forward now. Time for you to take the lead.”
Josina sank down onto the sofa and sighed with exasperation. “I will talk to him. I will. I promise. Today just isn’t a good day.”
“Why not?” Siado demanded to know as she took a seat next to Josina.
“I kind of want to stay close to home today. I’m waiting on a couple of important phone calls.”
“What’s so important that you can’t go see Ben?”
Josina sighed. “The call I just received before you got here was about a death in the family.”
Siado’s hand flew up to her mouth, covering it as she gasped. “Josina, I’m so sorry. Who passed? And are you okay? Oh my God, I’m so inconsiderate for showing up here like this, just barging in—”
“No, no, no,” Josina cajoled. “You didn’t do anything wrong. It was my stepfather who died, and he was a horrible person. I won’t miss him at all, but my mother certainly will. She and I have been estranged since I was a teenager because of him, so his death opens the door for us to reconnect.”
“Oh wow,” Siado murmured. “How are you feeling about it?”
“Honestly? Mixed feelings. I love my mother and would like for us to be a part of each other’s lives again, but part of me is also very angry at her, for having abandoned me. My stepfather was very controlling and forbid her to have a relationship with me after he kicked me out, so I understand why she felt like she had to. But I’m still hurting, still carrying that trauma with me. I hope she’ll be willing to acknowledge the harm and will want to make amends.” She paused. “At the same time, I feel very sorry for her, because I too abandoned a daughter, and I know how it feels. I have carried that sorrow with me as well, for just as long as she has.”
“Josina,” Siado began, “you gave your baby up for adoption because you were just a kid. You didn’t have the means to care for her. It’s not the same thing as what your mother did to you. You didn’t abandon your daughter. I don’t think so, anyway.”
“I appreciate that, really, but it only matters to me what Jasmine thinks.”
“Jasmine?” Siado’s eyebrows shot up on her forehead. “That’s your daughter’s name?”
Nodding with excitement, Josina reached for her phone. “The agency that facilitated her adoption sent her the letter I wrote. She replied to them, letting them know that she’d like to establish contact with me. So now I’m waiting for her to call. But in the meantime, I can’t stop looking at her picture.” Josina found the photo of Jasmine on her phone and tilted the screen toward Siado.
“She looks just like you!” Siado exclaimed. “She’s beautiful! I’m so happy for you!”
“Thank you,” said Josina. “And thank you again for the part you played in helping me realize I needed to do this, to take the first step and reach out to her. I hope to hear from her soon, but I understand she probably has mixed feelings, just like I do about my own mother. I’m trying to be patient. It’s hard. And I’m glad you stopped by, actually. I’ve been wanting to give you the update and show you the picture. No one else here at Wayside knows yet.”
“Aw, Josina.” Siado grinned. “You make me feel so special.”
“Ditto. You do the same for me.”
Siado glanced at the picture of Jasmine again. “I almost feel like she’s my sister.”
“How so?” Josina laughed.
“Because, like I told you, you’re the one who’s always looking out for me since my mom and grandma died. To me, you’re like your teacher that you told me about. The one who took care of you and loved you like you were her own daughter.”
“Ola,” Josina whispered. “My hooyo.”
“What does that mean?” Siado asked.
“It’s the Somali word for mum. She was like a mother to me when I needed one the most. We chose to be family to each other.”
“Then that’s what you are to me,” Siado said with conviction. “You’re my hooyo. Even though I’m not a kid anymore, I’ve still needed a mother figure in my life, and you’re the one who’s been there for me every time. So whenever you meet Jasmine, you’ll have to let her know that I’m part of the family too. You and I are a package deal.”
“Alright,” Josina laughed softly. “Your mother and grandmother would be so proud of the young lady you’ve become, the woman you’re becoming. Since they aren’t here, I’m happy to stand in for them, to keep looking out for you, and always letting you know how wonderful you are.”
“Me too.” Siado lifted her pinky finger, waited for Josina to hook hers around it. “Pinky swear. Somos familia.”
“Somos familia!” Josina exclaimed. “That means… we are family?”
“Yeah.” Siado’s grin faded to a frown. “I hope you mean that, because there’s another reason why I came here today.”
“Oh?” Josina placed her phone down, giving Siado her full attention. “Alright then. Somos familia. I’m all ears.”
“I fucked up, Josina.” Siado’s face contorted into a sorrowful expression. “I’m the one who vandalized the mural. I was really upset about not being able to bring Scarlett here for a visit. I just needed to let some of my anger out, but I picked the worst possible way to do it. Honestly, I regretted it as soon as I had done it. It’s a big part of the reason why I started taking my medication, because I didn’t want to lose control of my emotions again and do something else just as reckless. I’m so, so sorry.” She slumped over, covered her face with her hands, and broke into tears.
“Hey… it’s okay.” Josina rested a hand on her shoulder. “Thank you for trusting me enough to tell me. I wouldn’t say it was the worst thing you could have done. You didn’t mess up so badly that you can’t fix it.”
“I don’t know. I feel like I really screwed up. I know it upset a lot of people here at Wayside, and I broke the trust of everyone on the Founders’ Council. Now I’m scared I’ll get kicked out.”
“You’re not going to get kicked out,” said Josina. “Nobody wants that.”
“So how do I fix this?” Siado raised her head, wiped away streaks of dark makeup that had pooled under her eyes.
“First, you have to come clean. Let the Founders’ Council know. Apologize and accept responsibility, then offer to make amends.”
“And then what?”
“That’s it. I’m sure your fellow council members will have some things to say about it, so just listen to them, don’t get defensive, just remain apologetic and remind everyone you fully accept responsibility.”
“And how do you know they’ll accept my apology? How do you know everything will be okay?”
“Siado, why are you so hard on yourself?” Josina asked. “Have you forgotten that every single one of us here at Wayside is human, and we all fuck up sometimes? You’re not alone in making a mistake. This one is just very visible, but that’s okay. Everyone’s eyes will be on you once you come clean about this, but that’s not a bad thing. They’ll still be watching you to see what you do next. And the way you handle this can make all the difference in the world.”
Siado sniffled. “How so?”
“Well,” Josina relaxed back onto the sofa, stared at the ceiling while gathering her thoughts. “Envision this. Let’s say that once you make your confession to the Founders’ Council, you ask for permission to go to the academy and talk to the kids about it as well.”
Siado dropped her head again as fresh new tears began to fall. “I’m so ashamed. I don’t know how to face those kids.”
“They’ll forgive you.”
“How do you know?”
“They idolize you, Siado! They’ve grown up listening to your music and watching you become a star over the internet. But more than that, they love you. You’re not just a star, you’re one of their neighbors here at Wayside and they know you share their same values.”
“What a way for me to live up to those values, by spray-painting over them. They shouldn’t idolize me anymore.”
“Hey, look at me.” Josina reached for Siado’s chin, turning the sobbing girl’s face toward her. “Do you know what a gift this will be to those kids? They all make mistakes too. If you show up at their school to come clean, can you imagine what an impact that will have on them? They’ll see that you’re just as human as they are, so maybe they won’t beat themselves up quite so bad whenever they mess up. And they’ll learn from your example that the way to recover from screwing up is to apologize, take responsibility, and make amends. They’ll see you in a way they never have before – humble, caring, accountable. This is a lesson in integrity that they’d never be able to learn in a classroom.”
Siado’s face brightened. “That makes a lot of sense.”
“I think you’ll be surprised at how understanding everyone will be.”
“I imagine you’re right,” Siado sniffled. “I’m just bummed about having to drop this news on everyone right now, before the dance tomorrow night. Everyone is so excited right now. I think most people, including all the kids at the academy, have forgotten about the mural for the moment. I hate to be the one to change that.”
“So how about this,” Josina pondered aloud. “We’ve got our regular monthly in-person meeting of the Founders’ Council on Monday. You could make a statement there, after all the festivities of the weekend are over.”
“But we had an ultimatum,” Siado frowned. “If no one comes forward by the morning, the Founders’ Council is supposed to decide whether or not to involve local law enforcement.”
“Then I could send a message to the Founders’ Council this afternoon. I can say that the person who vandalized the mural is a Waysider who came to me in confidence and made a confession. I think everyone will be relieved to learn it’s someone from our own community. That will put a lot of worries to rest, especially for Joel and the security team. Then, I can state that I’m confident the person is not a danger to themselves or anyone else, and I feel there’s zero chance this person will be involved in another such incident. I can say that the person has asked for some time to craft a statement over the weekend and will approach the Founders’ Council on Monday to formally confess. What do you think?”
Siado took a few minutes to consider Josina’s plan. “Ok,” she said. “I trust you. Send the text.”
“I’m very proud of you,” said Josina. “You did the right thing. And I know you’ll keep doing the right thing. That’s why I’m willing to vouch for you.”
“That means a lot to me. I promise I won’t let you down.”
“I know.”
“How do you know?”
“Hooyos know everything. Come here.” Josina held out her arms, pulling Siado in for a hug.
“I know a few things too,” Siado said in singsong fashion.
“What’s that?”
“I know Ben Santos was just on your doorstep. He must have something important to say to you, so don’t wait too long to find out what it is.”
“I’ll reach out to him. But first, we need to get up and find another one of your songs.” Josina stood up from the sofa and held her hand out to Siado. “Dance with me? I need a bit more practice before I try and take the lead.”
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