Wayside: A Serial Novel - Episode 15
This is a work of fiction. Unless otherwise indicated, all the names, characters, businesses, places, events and incidents in this book are either the product of the author's imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.
Episode 15: Trap
October 8, 2026
Chris stared at the handpainted sign above the building.
He took a deep breath, catching a whiff of the fragrance from Cassie’s shampoo that was lingering on his shirt. She’d stepped out of the shower that morning, amused to find that their bath towels would no longer wrap around her midsection. Her belly seemed to have grown by leaps and bounds overnight. She’d laughed, then teared up with the realization that the baby was starting its descent into her pelvis in preparation for birth. Dr. Bercerra had told them that once ‘the drop’ began, Cassie could expect to go into labor within a few days to a few weeks. She and Chris had exchanged a joyful embrace knowing the time was drawing near.
“I shouldn’t go,” Chris had told her. “You could go into labor at any minute.”
“You have to go,” Cassie had insisted. “Our son hasn’t even been born yet, and he’s already the most important thing in the world to us. I understand it now, how fierce the love is between a mother and a child. You have to go say goodbye to your mom. She needs you, Chris. I know she does.”
He had a bad feeling about it, but she’d been adamant he go. Maybe she’d had a dream about it. Maybe she knew something he didn’t.
Still, a sense of dread lingered within him. With Chase’s revelation about the loss of their home and his mention of money problems, Chris knew this was about more than his mother’s decline.
Upon arriving at the motel, Chris put his car into park.
His hand lingered on the gear shift lever as he fought the temptation to throw it in reverse and return to Wayside.
Welcome to Lucky Lodge, read the sign before him.
The ancient roadside motel was anything but lucky. The parking lot was full of cars that were more rust than anything else. Curtains that were yellowed from cigarette smoke hung in the windows. The doors had doorknobs instead of electronic sensors for entry; some had shoeprints and dents from being kicked in. The sidewalk that wrapped around the building was littered with fast food wrappers, cigarette butts, crushed beer cans, an abandoned flip-flop, a dried pool of blood. The skunky odor of marijuana hung heavy in the air.
How could you bring our dying mother here? Chris was ready to pounce on his younger brother for the answer to that question, and a long list of others. He dialed Chase’s number.
“Hey,” Chase answered. “How much longer till you get here?”
“I just arrived,” said Chris.
“Good. We’re in room 13.”
Fitting, thought Chris. The unluckiest room at the thoroughly unlucky Lucky Lodge.
“I’m not coming in until you and mom take a test. I’ve got them packed. I can come in and give you the swabs and run the unit in my car—”
“Don’t be like that,” Chase scoffed. “First time you see us in six years and you’re going to treat us like plague rats?”
“I’m not going to waste my time defending my precautions to you. You and Mom can test or I can back right out of my parking spot and go back home.”
“Alright, alright,” Chase sighed with frustration. “It’s just that Mom’s mind isn’t altogether there anymore. She fights me every time I try to get her to swallow her pills. I don’t even want to think about what it’s going to take to get one of those things up her nose. It’s really stressful for her.”
Chris dropped his head, racked with guilt again. “I hadn’t thought about that. I’m sorry. I’ll just keep my respirator on and we won’t worry about the testing.”
“Masks scare her,” Chase began, “it’s the dementia. She’ll freak out of she sees you wearing one. How about this instead – there’s a picnic table behind the hotel. I ordered some pizzas and sodas for us, so as soon as they get here, we could go sit down outside and have lunch together to catch up. You could take off your mask outdoors to eat, couldn’t you?”
“I can do that. I just need to sit at a distance from you and Mom, so don’t give me a hard time about it.”
“Sure.”
“I’ll go find the picnic table and wait for you and Mom.”
“Okay.” Chase coughed. “And thanks for coming out here, bro. I appreciate it.”
Chris pulled his car out of the parking space and drove to the back of the building. As Chase had told him, a dilapidated picnic table stood adjacent to a dumpster, trash scattered around the perimeter of both. He parked and cut the engine.
Worry continued to gnaw at his insides. He messaged Cassie, hoping for a quick reply with reassuring words.
Hi angel, miss you already. Just got to the Lucky Lodge and I’m waiting to meet Chase and my mom by the picnic table behind this scary-looking place. I’m weirded out about this whole thing, Cass. ☹
She replied a few minutes later.
Just started having contractions. Heading out to hop on the next tram to the health ctr.
“Oh God,” Chris murmured. He started to dial Cassie’s number.
Then he dropped his phone, startled by a knock on his glass window. Had it not been for the two pizza boxes cradled over his forearm, his brother would have been unrecognizable.
Chase looked nothing at all like Chris remembered. His hair was long and unkempt. He’d gained at least twenty pounds, the bulk of it in his midsection. He wore an oversize grey t-shirt that was covered in sweat rings and spill stains.
None of it was as shocking as the changes to Chase’s face. His cheeks sagged, his forehead was scored with wrinkles. The iris and pupil of his right eye were obscured by cloudy-looking tissue. When Chase smiled, Chris noticed he’d lost an incisor.
Behind Chase, their mother was slumped over in a wheelchair. She’d lost so much weight, she too was barely recognizable. Her eyes were open, but her expression was vacant. Like Chase, her hair was long and unkempt, her clothes visibly soiled.
Chris felt as if the wind had been knocked out of him. The feelings of guilt and shame returned in an instant.
Why, why, why did I leave them behind? He shouted to himself in his mind. I should have saved them from this. I should have tried harder. I should have—
“Let’s eat before it gets cold!” Chase yelled through the window, followed by a dry cough.
Chris braced himself for the awkwardness. The sadness. The… smell. He’d actually begun to smell it through the window. He wondered how long they’d been out on the street. He wondered again how they got to North Carolina.
He wondered what was really going on.
Chris reached for his phone to reply to Cassie.
I love you, baby. Let me know as soon as you get there and send me updates as you find out more. Hopefully it’s false labor, like Dr. B. told us about. I’ll get back home to you as soon as I can. Going to have lunch outside with Chase and my mom right now.
He opened the door, knowing before he even stepped out that something was wrong.
***
After Reese finished her last lap, she stepped out of the pool to find Ben waiting for her.
“Good morning, little mermaid,” he joked as he handed her a towel.
“Ahhhh, thank you!” She dried herself off, then slipped into her sweatpants and jacket. “The heated water is so pleasant when you’re in the pool, but once you get out, that cold air is brutal!”
“Sounds uncomfortable,” said Ben.
“It is,” she nodded. Then added, “But it’s worth it.”
Ben settled onto a poolside chair. “Got a few minutes?”
“I’ve got all the time in the world for you, my friend.” Reese sat in the chair across from him, mirroring his posture. “Glad you came and found me this morning. I could tell you had a lot on your mind last night at the mall.”
“Yeah. It wasn’t exactly the best place for a private conversation.”
“As you can see, the waterpark at sunrise in October is about as private as you can get,” Reese waved her arm around dramatically. “No other signs of human life, so whatever you say is just between us.”
Ben looked down at his hands, which were more fidgety than normal. His palms were sweating. He clasped them together for a moment, as if trying to contain his anxiety. “It’s about Olivia. And her mother.”
“What’s going on?”
“Olivia opened up last night and told me more about their situation. It’s a familiar tale, Reese.” Ben sighed loudly. “Her mother is an undocumented immigrant, just like my mom was. We were both fathered by men who weren’t a part of our lives, so our mothers were the only family we had. They took care of us all throughout our childhoods, then we both had to step up and take care of them when they got sick. The difference between our stories is that I was fathered by a wealthy man who gave my mother a home on a small island. It was isolated, and fairly insulated from the outside world. We never felt unsafe there. Unfortunately for Olivia, she didn’t have that same privilege, that same security. Since her mother crossed the border into the United States, she’s lived life on the run, just trying to avoid getting detained and deported. Now that she’s terminally ill and dying, Olivia is trying her hardest to keep her mom safe.”
“So unlike us here at Wayside, where our main worry is about staying safe from infectious diseases, Olivia is trying to keep her mom safe from barbarians who would kidnap her from her literal deathbed, then disappear her to someplace where she would suffer and die a lot faster.”
“Yeah.” Ben looked down. “But we could keep them safe here at Wayside.”
“Yes, we could,” said Reese. “Has Olivia put in an application yet? Has she thought about bringing her mother to Gateway Lodge to start the 10-day quarantine?”
He frowned. “I’m worried there won’t be enough time, if she tries to go through all the proper channels. It doesn’t seem realistic to expect that everything would happen as smoothly – and as swiftly – as we’d all hope it would. Even if she applied today, and even if we were able to expedite her approval, I don’t know if a hotel room at the Gateway Lodge would be the right environment for her to care for her mom for a week and a half, or if she’s even stable enough to be moved around multiple times. All I know is that I feel an overwhelming sense of… panic. Like something bad is going to happen to her, or her mother, or both of them if I don’t do something to help them.”
“Okay,” said Reese. “So what other options are there?”
Ben looked up. “I could just go get her mother, bring her to Wayside, and let the two of them stay here for as long as they need. I could give them my container home. I could ask Su-Jin to make a housecall and set up nutrition, pain management… whatever she needs to stay comfortable. Olivia could stay by her side and they’d want for nothing. But that plan is problematic for a number of reasons.”
Reese nodded. “So let’s talk about those reasons. Tell me what they are.”
“All of what I just described is against protocols here at Wayside,” Ben lamented. “I mean, I’m technically the owner of this entire property, so if I decided to do it, no one could stop me. But it would still be wrong. We all came together as a community and wrote our own rules for how we’d coexist here. I’d be a hypocrite if I broke them.”
“But… it also feels wrong to you to not do more for Olivia and her mother right now, when you have the opportunity to intervene, and the means to help.”
“Yes.”
Reese paused for a moment to process the complexities of Ben’s dilemma.
“What should I do?” He asked her.
“I can’t make that decision for you, Ben,” Reese lamented. “But I can listen as you keep thinking out loud, and help you find your way to the right answer. You can see the right – and the wrong – in each of your options. Is there one that seems like the most right thing to do? Or the most wrong thing to do for that matter?”
Ben’s gaze drifted away. “I hate to say it, but no. I just keep hearing my mother’s voice in my head. ‘Keep your promises, and help others when you have the means to do so.’ How am I supposed to rank those in terms of merit? Because whatever I decide to do, I’ll have to disappoint somebody. I don’t know how to make that decision.” He looked around nervously, as if the thoughts he’d shared out loud might have been overheard.
Reese stood up, stepping away from her pool chair to sit next to Ben on his. “Mind if I join you here?” She asked.
He nodded. “Yeah. That’s fine.”
“Thanks,” Reese said. “You know Ben, you’re the kindest and most generous person I’ve ever met.”
“Thank you.” He smiled slightly.
“I don’t want you to take this the wrong way,” she cautioned, “but maybe you’re kind and generous to a fault at times. It isn’t your place to save everyone.”
“I’m not trying to save everyone. Just Olivia. And her mom.”
“Okay. Why?”
“Because… God put them in my path. It would be a sin not to help them. And because Olivia asked.”
“What did she ask for? Did she ask you to bring her and her mother to Wayside without going through all the proper channels?”
“No, of course not.”
“So what, specifically, did Olivia ask of you?”
Ben closed his eyes, calling up the memory of his first conversation with Olivia. “She said she was lonely and just needed someone to talk to. She just wanted a friend. That’s all she really asked of me.”
“And you’ve done that. You’ve been a very good, and generous friend to her.”
He nodded.
“So maybe it’s time to let yourself off the hook.”
Ben frowned. “What do you mean?”
“I mean, she wanted a friend, you became her friend. And once you learned about her circumstances, it was your idea to offer to host her for a visit here at Wayside. It was your idea to show her around our community, take her to the school, let her meet the teachers, introduce her to other Waysiders… you even bought her a dress to the dance tomorrow night. Last night at the mall, I saw her reach into her purse for her wallet, but before she could pull it out, you put your card down on the counter to pay for her dress. You did all of that without her asking, right?”
“You’re right. I guess I didn’t even realize it.”
“So why do you think you’ve done so much for her?” Reese asked.
Ben sighed. “It’s hard to explain. I feel like… like… I owe her, somehow. There’s something about her… I just don’t know how to say it, Reese. I’m sorry.” Ben rested his elbows on his knees, his face in his palms.
“It’s alright,” Reese said softly. “Hey… I’m going to ask you to do something that’s out of your nature, Ben. For a minute, forget about Olivia. And her mom. And everyone else here at Wayside.”
“Okay.”
“What do you want?” Reese asked. “Just pretend for a second that everyone else’s needs are all taken care of, and now, for once, you can think about your own needs, your own wishes, your own hopes for what you want out of life. What is it you need more than anything else?”
Ben blinked several times, fidgeted with his hands for a moment, then clasped them together. “Josina.”
Reese smiled. “What’s keeping you from her?”
Ben exhaled loudly. “Me. I’ve taken her for granted, maybe even pushed her away. She needed more from me, and I didn’t give it to her.”
“So why not change that?”
“I’d like to. It’s not that simple.”
“Well,” Reese began, “based on what you’ve told me about your relationship with Josina, it seems like she’s the one person who’s always been able to help you think through dilemmas like this, and make decisions that feel right to you. Maybe she’s the one you should be talking to right now.”
“I think you’re right.” Ben looked up, dropped his hands in his lap. “Olivia is supposed to leave Wayside on Saturday, so Josina and I made plans to spend time together that day for our long-awaited talk.”
“Maybe you need to do some talking before Saturday?”
“Yes, I see that now. I feel like I’m flailing inside my mind, but frozen when it comes to taking action. It’s like I’m caught in a trap and I can’t find my way out. Nothing in my life makes sense without her.”
“Then get your head out of your ass and make it make sense again.” Reese playfully punched his arm. “Go to her.”
“I will.” He glanced down at his watch. “I should probably wait for her to wake up, though. It’s still early.”
“So go get your swim trunks and take a dip until she’s awake.”
Ben laughed. “That’s okay.”
Reese tilted her head up toward the sky. “You know why I enjoy swimming so much?”
“No, why?”
“Long story. There was a creek behind my childhood home. When I was little, I used to go there with my dad and walk across the stones in the water while he was fishing. One day I slipped and fell in. I didn’t know how to swim, and a strong current pulled me under. My dad wasn’t paying close attention to me, so it took him several minutes to realize I was missing. Once he did, he dove into the water and pulled me out. He shook me and slapped my back and gave me rescue breaths until I spit up all the water and could breathe again.”
Been gasped. “You almost drowned! I’m so sorry, Reese. God, how awful that must have been.”
“Actually,” Reese smiled, “it wasn’t awful at all. It was amazing. I felt myself slipping away from this world, but it was… wonderful, what was beyond it. For a short little while, I was hovering above the earth. My consciousness was, anyway. I could see one of my sneakers had drifted all the way down to a different part of the creek and got trapped in the submerged roots of a tree. I could see my father frantically swimming toward me. I could hear him crying, calling out to God to spare me. I could see my body face down in the water below. I could feel that I was leaving, that I was dying, but I wasn’t scared. I felt at peace. I felt… like I was exactly where I belonged. I could see and hear and smell and feel everything all at once. Not just this world, Ben. The entire universe. It was like a big jigsaw puzzle, and I was just one tiny little piece of it, yet I was all of it. I was within the universe, and the universe was within me, and it was all connected, and it all made sense.”
“Wow,” Ben whispered. “I’m glad the universe decided to let you come back.”
“It didn’t. I did.”
“Really?”
“Yes. As weird as it sounds, I was in control. I was hovering between life and death and I recognized the choice was mine. I chose to come back.”
“What made you decide to return? Was it because of how upset your father was?”
“Actually, no. I could feel all of his panic, all of his pain in that moment, but I could feel how fleeting it was. Pain is temporary. Peace is eternal, and I knew my family would have made peace with my death eventually. Death is natural, even when it comes early. I felt at peace knowing that.”
“But you chose to come back instead.”
“Of course. I refused to die a litterer.”
“What?” Ben asked with genuine surprise.
Reese looked down at her feet. “Remember those anti-littering commercials they’d run between cartoons on Saturday mornings when we were kids? It was drilled into my brain that littering is wrong and it hurts the environment. I figured no one would ever find my missing sneaker, and I couldn’t let that rubber sole break down into toxins and poison the roots of the tree, and the fish and the crabs and all the little microscopic plankton in the water, and even the water itself. I had to come back and make it right.”
Ben broke into laughter. “You’re kidding.”
“No. I’m dead serious,” Reese laughed with him.
“So after you recovered from that near-death experience, you went and fished your sneaker out of the creek.”
“I sure did. My dad couldn’t believe I knew where it was. I explained to him everything I just shared with you. I’m not sure he believed me back then.” She paused. “But he knows for sure now.”
“How funny,” Ben grinned. “I have a shoe to thank for saving your life. Thank you, Reese’s sneaker.”
“It sounds illogical, doesn’t it?”
“Not really, not the way you explained it to me.”
“We’re a lot alike, Ben. Remember I told you how validating it was for me to open up to the therapist who helped me understand my autism diagnosis?”
“Yes, I remember.”
“We spent a lot of time talking about moral rigidity,” said Reese. “The autistic brain has a tougher time with grey areas of morality. So, we autistic folks tend to stick within the confines of what we’ve been taught is right and wrong. Anytime we’re forced to venture outside those lines, we experience what’s called moral distress. And that can be painful, my friend. We can feel the weight of it so deeply, it can hold us back from living fulfilling lives if we don’t seek to better understand ourselves and our emotions.”
Ben straightened his posture. His eyes widened, blinked several times. “What did you do to better understand yourself?”
“It’s not what I did, it’s what I do. I meet twice a month with a brilliant therapist who seems to know me better than I know myself. She had me start keeping a journal to reflect on what’s happening in my life and how I react to it, so I can get to know myself better too. She also asked me to define my purpose for my life, and set goals for myself – and revise them, as needed. I’ve learned to set boundaries to protect my time, my energy, and my emotions. I’ve learned how to meditate, so I can be mindful and present in every moment. Most importantly, I’ve come to recognize that I’m imperfect and there’s only so much I can do; there’s only so much I can control. I make mistakes, just like everyone else. We all have our struggles, Ben. It’s part of being human. So I’ve had to learn to be kind to myself, to show myself grace. And extend that same grace to others.”
Silence filled the void between them for several moments.
“Is your therapist taking new patients?” Ben asked.
“I’m sure she is. I’d be happy to make an introduction. I really think you’d like working with her.”
“I think you’ve talked me into it.” Ben rose to his feet. “I should get going. Oh – wait, I asked you why you enjoyed swimming so much, and I’m not sure I caught the answer.”
“You didn’t catch it, because I didn’t throw it at you yet.” Reese grinned as she stood to face Ben. “I guess it sounds strange, after nearly drowning as a child, that I’d have such an affinity for swimming. But it’s the exact opposite. I feel safe in the water. It brings me right back to that feeling of floating above the world, of being connected to everything. It reminds me that I hold the universe within me. All its magic and mystery, all its wisdom and wonder. I’m a tiny little piece of something much, much bigger than myself, something that would be incomplete without me.”
“That’s beautiful.”
“You’re beautiful,” said Reese.
Ben blushed and laughed awkwardly.
“I mean it,” she said. “You have a beautiful, gentle soul, Ben. We could have been opposite corners in the jigsaw puzzle of the universe, but instead, we ended up right here, side by side. I can’t tell you how thankful I am for that.”
“Me too.” He started to raise his arms, hesitated for a second, then brought them up toward Reese. “Can I… have a hug?”
“If you don’t mind getting a little wet from my swimsuit.”
“Of course not.” He stepped forward, arms trembling as they wrapped around her. “I’m sorry. I’m not usually a very huggy guy. I just feel like I’m torn. Maybe you can hug me back together until I can figure out what I need to do.”
Reese patted his back with a motherly tenderness. “I’m not accepting that apology. You don’t say you’re sorry for asking for what you need. I’m your chaplain, and more importantly, I’m your friend. I never want you to feel sorry for asking for my time and attention, or even for a hug. I’ll squeeze you right back together whenever you feel like you’re falling apart. That’s what I’m here for, okay?”
“Thank you.” He hugged her tighter.
“Ben,” Reese whispered in his ear, “whatever is holding you back from the happiness you deserve? It’s just a sneaker.”
“What do you mean?” He pulled back, his brow knit with confusion.
“I mean, when I think back on my near-death experience, I realize how silly it was for me to have made my decision over a sneaker. I believe I did the right thing and by all means, I’m glad I fished my shoe out of the creek and relieved my guilty conscience. But it was just a sneaker, Ben. No one should be making life-or-death decisions over a sneaker. There should be more important reasons for us to make the choices we do, about how we live and who we love and what paths we take toward a fulfilling existence.”
He pondered her words. “What did you do with the sneaker, anyway?”
She shrugged nonchalantly. “I don’t even remember. I had a life to live, people to care for, important things to do in the world. I wouldn’t have been able to do it all, had I been carrying the weight of a soggy shoe with all my other emotional baggage.” Reese smiled. “It’s just a sneaker, Ben.”
***
Chris felt woozy. His ears were ringing. After blinking several times, he looked around the room.
Where am I?
Before him were two beds covered by raggedy bedspreads. Clothes were half-hanging out of a duffel bag atop one of them. The nightstand between the beds held empty fast-food cups and a shoe box full of pills. A banged-up dresser was against the wall to his left with an old TV on top. On the opposite wall was an open door to a bathroom. Ancient fixtures, moldy ceiling.
He looked down to find he was sitting on an old, stained armchair. Beside him, his mother was slumped over in her wheelchair, staring at him wide-eyed.
“Who are you?” She mumbled.
Chris reached for her hand. “Mama, it’s me, Chris. I’m your son. I know we haven’t seen each other in a few years but I’m still the same old me I’ve always been and—”
Panic seized him. He shot to his feet, found he was unsteady, then sank back down into the armchair. He touched his face.
No mask.
His heart thumped loudly in his chest. “Oh God.” He looked around for his N95 but couldn’t find it. “What happened? I don’t remember…”
How did I get here? Chris asked himself.
His last memory was of waking up that morning to see Cassie stepping out of the shower, the two of them noting the changes in her belly, then hugging…
“Chase, where’s Chase?” His mother asked.
Chase.
The mention of his name began to unwind his loss of memory.
Chris suddenly recalled driving to the Lucky Lodge. Talking to Chase on the phone. Driving around to the crappy picnic table. His shock at the sight of his brother and mother.
They’d sat at the picnic table to eat pizza. Chase poured sodas in a red solo cup and placed them on the table. He’d shown Chris pictures of his new girlfriend. He was so proud of her. They were going to get married, Chase had said. Chris had continued to eat and drink to keep his mouth busy, so he didn’t have to talk.
He’d been speechless.
“Where is Chase?” His mother asked again.
“Chase?” Chris called out. He reached up to his face, cupping his hand over his mouth as his awareness returned. “I… I need to find my mask, Mama. Chase was coughing. I can’t get sick.” He looked around the room again, then yelled for his brother. “Chase? CHASE! Mama, where is Chase?”
“I don’t know you,” his mother mumbled, each word leaving her mouth at a painfully slow pace. “Get out of my house… you trash, you rat bastard.”
“Mama, it’s me,” Chris whimpered, his voice tightening with emotion. He felt himself beginning to hyperventilate. “Chase?” He called out again. Once he had the presence of mind to reach for his phone, he pulled it out of his pocket. There were two texts and a missed call from Cassie. He audibly gasped as his eyes fixed on the time.
More than four hours had passed since his arrival.
“Chase?” He called out again. When there was no answer, he dialed his brother’s line.
Chase answered on the second ring. “Don’t be mad at me.”
“What did you do, Chase?”
“Calm down. I told you when I was walking you into the room, you must have forgotten.”
“Told me what?”
“That I needed to borrow your car to go see Samantha.”
“Who’s Samantha?”
“I told you – my fiancé. We met on a dating app. She lives in New Jersey. That’s why I need you to take care of Mom—”
“Bring my car back, right now,” Chris interrupted. “How did I get into the room? What did you do with my mask?”
“Don’t you remember, we were eating pizza and I poured us all a drink? I think you must have mixed up Mom’s drink with yours. I had to crush up some of her pills and put them in liquid so she can swallow them. One of them was a sedative. You drank some soda and said you were feeling sleepy, so I helped you inside our room.”
“Bullshit!” Chris shouted. “You drugged me on purpose!”
At his side, his mother began to wail. Chris reached for her hand. She swatted it away.
“Tell Mom I love her and I’m sorry,” Chase said, followed by a series of coughs.
“Sorry for what?”
“It’s your turn to take care of her now. I’m sorry, Chris. I’ve been doing it for too long and I just can’t anymore.”
“You told me she was dying.”
“I mean… she will, eventually. But right now she’s got dementia and it’s just too much for me to handle on my own. You don’t understand what it’s been like, taking care of her. I’m exhausted. You and Cassie got to step up and help her now. I deserve to be happy too. When I get to New Jersey, Samantha will pick me up and I’ll be staying with her. I’ll text you and let you know where your car is so you can come get it.”
“Samantha?”
“I told you all about her while we were eating lunch. Remember?”
Chris closed his eyes as more of his memories came rushing back to the forefront of his mind.
Pizza.
Red solo cup full of bitter-tasting soda.
Chase proudly announcing he was getting married, then scooting across the bench to get closer to Chris.
Next, Chase was pulling up a series of photos on his phone with a spider web crack in the middle of the screen. Swiping through picture after picture of the woman he believed he was talking to.
“I never thought I’d be so lucky,” Chase had told him.
“You’re kidding, right?” Chris had asked. “Those pictures aren’t even of the same girl. One is a stock photo. It’s still got the watermark on it. The others look like they were grabbed from adult sites. You really think these women are the same person… and they want to marry you?”
“That’s just like you to criticize me!” Chase had blown up. “You’ve always been the golden child with your perfect grades and computer nerd bullshit. You’ve always thought you were better than me. That’s why I’m going to live with Samantha. She respects me. She sees the best in me!”
“I can’t believe—” Chris remembered how he’d suddenly started slurring his words, how heavy his eyes felt.
Chase had helped him to the room. Sat him down in the chair. Brought their mother in, then stepped out again. The door closed behind him.
“It’s all just now coming back to me.” Chris was so angry he was shaking. “What did you do with my mask?”
“I think I left it on the bathroom counter.” Chase coughed again. “You were trying to put it on before you came inside but I wouldn’t let you. Remember I’ve been telling you how it scares Mom, to see people in masks.”
“So you just left me exposed, knowing that if I catch something and bring it home to Cassie, it could kill her,” Chris said. “You’re sick.”
“It’s just a cold. You think everything is Covid. Quit worrying, I’ve had it enough times I’m immune now. Mom too.”
“I meant you’re mentally unwell, you selfish asshole,” Chris sobbed. “You deserve to be locked up with Dad. I’ll never forgive you for this.”
He ended the call and threw his phone across the room. It hit the wall and slid to the floor. Then he rested his elbows on his knees and wept into his hands.
“Get out,” his mother mumbled again. “My husband will be home any minute and he’ll beat your ass.”
“I’m your son Chris, Mama,” Chris assured her again. “Your other son Chase left you here with me. This isn’t your home, it’s a motel. And you’re not married. You divorced our father when we were little.”
“Get out,” she repeated, swatting at him with her hand.
Chris stood again, his head woozy once more. He stumbled toward the wall, leaned against it as he made his way to the bathroom. He found his respirator on the sink. Then he stepped out and retrieved his phone from the floor.
The screen was cracked.
Just like Chase’s phone, he mused. I’ll never be able to escape this family, no matter what I do.
He dialed Cassie.
“Hey!” She answered on the first ring. “I was starting to get worried. How’s it going?”
Chris couldn’t talk. He wailed loudly.
“Is it your mom?” Cassie asked with desperation. “Did she die already? Chris? Talk to me baby, what’s going on? Do I need to come to you?”
“No… don’t… don’t come.” He finally regained his composure, inhaled and exhaled a few times to stop the spasming of his larynx. “It was a trap, Cassie. Chase drugged me and stole our car.”
“WHAT?” Cassie cried out. “Are you okay? Is your mom okay?”
“Yeah. But Chase is driving to New Jersey to meet someone he’s been talking to online. He left me in the motel room with our mother. She doesn’t remember me and keeps cussing at me and telling me to get out. She’s not dying, not right now. But she’s not well and needs care. He’s probably been neglecting her for a really long time. and it’s all my fault. I’m such an asshole for not paying more attention to them, for not figuring out what was going on.”
“Baby, I am so sorry,” Cassie said softly. “None of this is your fault. If you can get your Mom to Wayside, she can quarantine at Gateway Lodge for 10 days and come stay with us, however long she needs to.”
“That won’t work,” he said. “Chase said the sight of masks scare her. He’s mentioned it before so I’m inclined to believe him. It’s stressful enough for her to be around me and not even know who I am, so I don’t want to bring her to a place where she’d be seeing them regularly.”
“Get out!” his mother cried once more from across the room.
“Oh my God,” Cassie’s voice trembled. “I can hear her.”
“What about you?” Chris asked. “What about the baby? Are you okay?”
“Yes, it was just Braxton Hicks contractions,” Cassie said with relief. “They stopped a little while after you left. Dr. Bercerra checked me out and said I’m okay, but this means the countdown is on and I need to take it easy till the baby arrives. I’ll tell you everything she said when you get back.”
“Cass,” Chris wept loudly again, “I can’t come back home to you. Not yet. Chris was sick. For all I know, my mother is too. All my testing supplies are still in the car and I have no idea what I’ve been exposed to. I’m so sorry. I can’t believe I let this happen. I can’t believe my own family would do this to me. To us.”
“They’re not your only family,” Cassie reminded him. “You’ve still got me. And this baby. And everyone here at Wayside. We’re your family too and we’re not going to let you struggle through this alone. Have you called 911?”
“Why would I call 911?” Chris asked.
“Your brother stole the car,” she said. “Shouldn’t you report it? Maybe they could pick him up and bring him back—”
“They wouldn’t just pick him up and bring him back here. Depending on where he is, auto theft might very well be a felony. Best case scenario, he’d be locked up for what might be the rest of his life. Worst case, he might resist or try to run and end up dead. I can’t do that to him. He’s an asshole, and I’ll never forgive him for this. But… he’s still my little brother.”
“I understand,” Cassie said softly. “What can I do to help?”
“I don’t know. I’m so overwhelmed right now. I can’t think clearly.”
“It’s okay. You’re not alone. Give me a few seconds to do something.” Noisy clicks of her keyboard followed. “First, we need to get you and your mother out of that place. I just made a reservation for you at the Best Guest extended stay. It’s much safer than Lucky Lodge and closer to Wayside. I’ll ask Joel to have someone on his team drive one of the carshare vehicles out to you so you’ll have transportation, and I can pack up some of your clothes, belongings, and tests to send along. Then I’ll reach out to Su-Jin to see if she can recommend a doctor in Pineville who could see your mom and come up with a plan of care.”
“Thank you,” Chris whispered. “I’d be so lost without you.”
“I don’t know,” Cassie sighed. “I feel horrible after insisting you go. I feel like I forced this on you. Even though I’ve dreamed of bad things happening and I’ve been walking around for weeks with this lingering feeling of doom, I didn’t foresee this in my dreams. I’m so sorry.”
“No,” Chris argued. “You were right. It’s a good thing I came, otherwise I don’t know what would have happened to my mother. Chase told me he’s done taking care of her and he expects us to take over. Had I not shown up, he probably would have hitched a ride with a stranger and left her here alone. This was his plan all along, to abandon her. I’m just livid because he made me abandon you in the process, right when you need me the most. I’m so angry at him, Cass. If I miss the birth of our son because of him—”
“It will be okay,” she interrupted. “Don’t worry about that right now. I’m so sorry this is happening, Chris, but you’re not alone. We’ll get through it together. I’m here for you and I love you.
“I love you too. And I love our son.”
She giggled. “FAB just gave me a good, swift kick in the kidneys. Maybe that was his way of saying ‘back at you, Daddy.’ You think?”
“Maybe so.” Chris closed his eyes and tried to imagine their little boy. At first he envisioned a chubby baby giggling in Cassie’s arms, then an enthusiastic toddler shouting out letters and numbers along with the puppets on Sesame Street.
And then an eager preschooler begging for a fast-food kid’s meal.
All he could see in his mind’s eye was young Chase standing at the doorway of his childhood home, clutching the hand of the officer who’d carried him away from a public shooting their father had been at least partly responsible for.
“I’m going to be a better father to him than my father was to me,” Chris said tearfully. “And to Chase. We both deserved better. I’ll do better for our son.”
“I know,” Cassie assured him. “I never doubted you. None of this is your fault, Chris. You’ve done far more for your family than most people would have done for theirs, given the situation. You didn’t deserve for any of this to happen, but you’ve chosen to show grace to your brother and take care of your mother anyway. I’m proud of your integrity, your loyalty, your commitment to always doing the right thing. If I had searched the whole world over to find the best father for my children, it still would have been you.”
“Thank you,” he whispered.
“Listen, I’m going to get going so I can connect with Joel and Su-Jin. Stand by, I’ll be in touch with updates.” Cassie disconnected the call.
Chris placed his phone on the nightstand and began looking through the shoebox full of meds.
“Bastard, I said get out!” His mother shouted once more. “Where is Ray? Where’s my husband?”
“Mama, it’s me—” Chris turned to look at her.
His phone chimed with an incoming message. Cassie had sent a link. Chris clicked it. It led him to a site titled ‘Tips for Caring for Loved Ones with Dementia.’
He read every word, then placed his phone down again.
Slowly, he approached his mother, settling back into the armchair by her side. “Tell me about Ray,” he said. “How did the two of you meet?”
Her face softened. “We were both in a wedding.” Although she spoke slowly, pausing at times to search for words, her memories seemed present and precise. “His friend Jonathan married my friend DeLisa. Ray was the handsomest of all the groomsmen. I told all the other bridesmaids I was going to marry him someday, because he’d make pretty babies.”
“And did you two have pretty babies?”
She blinked several times, then shifted slightly to face Chris. “We did,” she smiled. “We have two boys. They’re my heart and soul.”
Chris smiled, reaching for her hand. She accepted his touch.
“Well then tell me all about them,” he whispered through tears.
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